Self-doubt fills me yet again.

I'm really wondering, am I who I am because I'm truly like that, or am I like this because of how I have to behave, moulded to be someone who I actually am not.

Maybe being the cheerful, hyper girl who has a fetish for all things cute and bright coloured isn't supposed to be that way, but only is like that because of the way things in her life have turned out. Maybe choosing yellow as her fave colour was simply a way to constantly psycho herself to stay happy and cheerful. I get distracted by yellow and bright colours, and they say only mental patients are like that. Maybe I am mental then.

I really don't know kay. Emotions and everything are just confusing me over and over again. I suppose it has to do with hormones and growing up and stuff like that. But argh, I really don't know.

Sometimes I just wana end it all, you know. Maybe that's why I wrote The Tracks to begin with.